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Take a Step on the Wild Side

January 20, 2013

Every once in a while, I have to take a step back and stick my hot head in a big cauldron of ice-cold water, so to speak.  My brain starts showing signs of hard wear and tear, a little fizzle here, frazzle there.  I imagine frayed wires loosened and sparking erratically, from my spazzed-out wildly pulsating gray matter.  Living in the age of information can bring on sensory overload, and begin to fry the brain, if we’re not careful, or something like that…

Curiosity often fuels me.  The absolutely insatiable need to know, and the process of making sense of things I come to know, as well as the exercise of discernment and scrapping of the ridiculous, can be so very taxing and consuming.  I feel compelled to keep watch, ever so vigilant, aside from the necessary breaks to cool the mind engine.   To know what is going on in the world, spiritually, politically, geologically, and try to figure out what’s being hidden or swept under the rug.

I have always been this way; even as a young girl, I would constantly be found looking out windows to see what was coming.

Mama and Daddy would discuss the evening news with me, as I was ever-curious about what was going on in the world.  Growing up in the country teaches one to always be aware of their surroundings.  You needed to be able to recognize the dangers and stay two steps ahead, in the physical and mental sense.  You always watch where you are going, as the dangers lurk all around, waiting to catch those who are found off-guard.  From a snake in the grass to a mountain lion, a poisonous berry to poison ivy, the dangers are very real.

I believe this necessary awareness I grew up in a state of, aids me today, though the forest changed to a tangled, warped web of endless information, distraction, and chatter.  I never have been interested with the distractions, per say.  Games don’t really appeal to me, with the exception of word games, although I have been known to get chatty a time or two, ha!

I first arrived on the internet scene in late 2000.  I had fought the urge to get online, for several years, with arguments that it was Pandora’s box and would bring nothing good about.  Once inside, immediately, I was drawn to the unexplained, the paranormal and it did seem like I had opened up something that I could not shut.  Night after night, I would learn more and more and then figure out how to work that into what I already knew in my heart to be true.

Over the years, the picture has just been growing in width, height, and depth, with more detail and dimension than we see here in living color.  But what took shape before me was evidenced, in real life, for some reason I still don’t understand.  I actually had my first few encounters with the paranormal before I got online in 2000.  Both experiences were while I was visiting my parents’ home, but on two separate occasions.

After saying goodnight, my mother departed to her bedroom, I was a little frightened by the program we had just finished, so I decided to sleep on the couch.  (Isn’t it interesting how the child in us reacts, when we are close to our parents?)   So I moved over to the couch, laid down, and when I opened my eyes and looked above me, there was a black being…I mean pitch-black-paper-cut-out-solid-being, standing behind the couch, looking straight down at me.

I could not see eyes or any other feature or shape of a face, no, he was the blackest black, void of any light, and made the (lack-of-streetlights) country darkness look bright around him.  I squeezed my eyes closed, as my heart was suddenly constricted, making itself known, inside my chest.  I opened my eyes hoping he would be gone, and froze in fear when he was not.  So I closed my eyes again, willing them shut for the night, and prayed myself to sleep.

The second time was completely different, and yet, still unsettling.  By that time, I had a toddler and an infant.  It was again time to retreat for bed, so I went upstairs to the attic bedroom, where my two little ones were already fast asleep.  After getting cozy in bed, my attentions were drawn to my infant son’s crib.  There was a little, whizzing golden light above his crib.

It looked like a miniature sun and moved like a hummingbird, it was golf-ball size with further-reaching glowing rays, beautiful really, but it did not leave me with a sense of peace.   It was gone in a flash.  I could not get to the crib fast enough, but there J was, still sweetly sleeping. Needless to say, I did not sleep well that night.

This paranormal stuff blew my mind.  I had never seen ghosts before and though I believed in the Spiritual realms of heaven and hell, I did not understand much else about it.  It would seem, for a long while at least, that this would be what I consider my awakening phase of life.

When I got to the internet, a year later, I found that my first experience wer not singular in nature.  What I did not mention above was that the black figure seemed to be wearing a fedora style hat and a cloak-like jacket.  I was still so disturbed by what I saw, that I began to research the paranormal and that’s when I came upon the Shadow People stories.  My journey probably began there.

But let us rewind again, and go back to pre-internet days.  Another unbelievable and unexplainable event took place in the early spring of 2000.  I had been outside talking with a neighbor when the barometric pressure just dropped, rather suddenly and wildly.  I knew a tornado was coming, so I ran and put my youngest in his car seat and put he and his brother in the tub, and cushioned it with their baby mattresses.    But my curiosity brought me back outside (windows were limited on that side of the house).  I walked to the edge of my carport, looked up and watched as a swirling darkness formed right above me!

Within this swirling soup of dark clouds, was a glowing green that I could only compare to the witches brew from the old Disney cartoons.  I used to joke that God’s eyes were green, as I felt like I was being peered down upon, from a giant illuminated green eye.   It swirled and formed a little finger.    It slowly moved behind my house, and out past the field.  By that time, it had grown a curly piglet’s tail.

This is an actual photo of the tornado before it touched down in a small subdivision in Leander, Texas. (not my pictures)

This is an actual photo of the tornado before it touched down in a small subdivision in Leander, Texas. (not my pictures)

This tornado ended up hitting a neighborhood 1.5 miles away.  It tossed a boat into the 2nd story side of a house.  It turned a swing set into a pretzel, and transported a wadded up trampoline over a block down from it’s original home.  My neighbor, a gal pal, and I left the kiddos with the men and had to go check out the damage for ourselves.  I had a similar reaction with the ’97 Jarrell tornado and aftermath.

I felt awe in the fact that I stood beneath it as it formed, and blessed that I was allowed to witness such  a mysterious and ferocious beast grow right overhead, and actually live to tell about it.  And though I am from Texas, these are not tall tales, but tales of my real past experiences.

Once I moved into the house where I first got the net, the experiences ramped up.  At the time, I was still very naive to the things of the spiritual world.  With my faith grounded in Jesus Christ, I never cared to dabble in the dark side, as I saw it as dangerous, on many levels.  But I didn’t realize the darker connotations of the Ouija game board (Milton Bradley packaged).  My sister’s home was behind the one we had just rented, and she had that “game”.  She brought it over the night we moved in.

We joked about it, and gave it a go, adding candles, for ambiance, and began asking questions.  Questions like, “Are good things going to happen here?”  We had both just moved to Beaumont, and were hopeful for brighter days than the ones we left behind.

I had a very strange feeling about the house from the get-go.   I felt weird vibes from the moment I set foot in the home, but it was absolutely lovely, with a massive living room, master bedroom, two baths, a very large kitchen with a breakfast nook, plus a dining room and a playroom.  So I had set aside the uneasiness and signed for the house.  Besides, my sister was in the home right behind me!

At some point, a toy went off in the playroom, one room over.  It scared the daylights out of us both.  We nervously went to the playroom to end the racket the toy was making, and to my horror, it was a toy that had not worked for a great while!  We kept banging it to make it stop.  It finally did.  Needless to say, that was the end of our Ouija consultations.  I am pretty sure she threw that thing away that night, because neither of us can recall what happened to it.

So many different strange things occurred while living in that house.  One such time, I was chatting on AOL with my younger cousin who lived in a nearby town.  I started telling her how I thought the house we lived in, could very well be haunted.  It was then that the microwave started going off.  Five beeps.  I told her to hold on, that I had to see why my microwave was going off.  I went into the kitchen and was horrified by what I saw.   In traditional computer block print, as the numbers on the microwave generally are, I read the word “ChILd”  The I was this sign | , only with a small break in the middle.

I checked with the owner’s manual later, to see if there was some sort of child-safety setting, and there was not.  I had no other explanation for this occurrence, other than that the “child” was attempting to make itself known.

When I went back to tell my cousin what had happened, the computer suddenly froze and cut off.  I cut it back on, freaked out –  mind you, and told her what had happened.

Another time, I was grilling on the front porch and I believe that I actually saw a small child, peeking through the window  of the very play room where the toy had gone off, the first night of our stay in that house.  The home also had never ending and absolutely horrific plumbing problems.  The problems did not end, even after the management company dug up the entire back yard and re-plumbed.   Sludge would come up from every sink and tub and shower in the home, it was dreadful to deal with as a young mother of four young babies.

this is what we faced weekly in both tubs, the shower and often times, the kitchen sink...blech!  Talk about bad memories!

this is what we faced weekly in both tubs, the shower and often times, the kitchen sink…blech! Talk about bad memories!

Yes, while in that home, my husband and I completed our family.  But by the time we left, that house had almost finished us off.  We separated for six months; he went back to central Texas looking for a steady income, and the children and I went to our generational family farm, to heal and recover.   It was during this time that I experienced something that I’m still trying to come up with answers to, so that story may have a few more decades before coming to light.

Once my husband and I made amends, I joined him in central Texas.  We’ve been in the area now for nine years.  My life has taken different turns in the sort of experiences and sights I’ve beheld, but it seems to be part of the journey to help form who I am and what my purpose, through Christ, is.  My life is far from what I had imagined and dreamed of as a young girl, but it has been a memorable adventure.  I’ve already, at 36, worn many hats, and as it is, I look forward to hats unknown in my future.   I’ve not even shared my season with UFOs sightings with you yet!  (Insert giggles here)  Really, should it surprise you?

I believe I have been allowed to see the unseen and witness God’s majesty, in order to share with others.  My experiences help me to weigh and validate or eliminate the flood of information that pours through my eyes on a daily basis.  I was allowed to experience the spirit world in order to validate the principalities spoken of in Ephesians.  I was allowed to see within a tornado to experience God’s mercy and grace first hand, and to share with you, His overwhelming love for His children.

Even during my separation, God showed me more.  He was capable of repairing something I was sure was broken beyond repair, and furthermore, wasn’t even sure I wanted repaired!  He renewed my love for my husband and strengthened our marriage substantially.  God is an amazing force to trust in as well as to reckon with.

I reckon He’ll be teaching me even more, for I am only 36 and have a lot of good learning years ahead of me, God willing.   I will continue to do what I can to bring light to the dark corners and reveal the situations of the day.

Once my mind cools off, I’ll be ready to uncover even more information to silt through and I look forward to the ways the Lord will use me in getting the important stuff out.  But as for the moment, at least, I’m taking a breather.  I’m dumping the collection of thoughts and knowledge, foresight and insight that has become a burden to me and I’m leaving it at the cross.

I’m so grateful for a Savior who willingly makes our burdens light…we just have to remember to ask.

Until Next Time,

Vaya con Dios

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