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Why I’m Blogging

About eight years ago, after a really rough night of twilight drinking in the secrecy of my bedroom, for the umpteenth time, after hugging the toilet goodnight and stumbling back to my bed, I instead, hit the floor, face down…on purpose.

 

My children were sleeping, my husband was on a 6 month stretch in North Carolina, and I was so tired of drinking myself to sleep to numb myself from my many failures and disappointments.  I never drank until the children were in bed, but I always knew I was wrecking my body and my mind with the self-inflicted abuse.  I was no stranger to the effects of alcoholism, and was very depressed to find myself in yet another pair of shoes in which I had once looked down upon.

 

So, out of desperation, I cried out to the Lord.  Actually, it started off as crying…asking forgiveness and for His strength to put down the bottle for good (man was I pathetic!), but turned into more of a screaming fit!! (I cannot believe I’m airing my dirty laundry!!  Good grief!)

 

I screamed in the dead of the night, “What exactly IS my purpose?  Why won’t you just let me die?  WHY am I still here?  I know I’m a mom, a wife, a daughter, granddaughter and sister, but seriously, this can’t be your total plan for me!!”

 

You see, I believed in God deeply!  Nothing could ever sever that belief, but I’d made such a dreadful set of choices in the past that I was sure I was beyond His mercy, beyond repair and beyond the Light of His Love, and I wallowed night after night in despair and regret, just knowing that I’d worn out God’s grace!  I forgot one truly important factor…God was my Heavenly Father!   Just as nothing could ever stop me from loving my children, no matter how deeply hurtful their words would one day be or how deeply disappointed I would become with some of their choices, such painful situations seem to only make me love them more!!
God’s love was right there, waiting for me to realize that in His Perfect Love,  that unconditional LOVE must be all the more true and concrete!!  I felt His Love pour down upon me in a MIGHTY way!!

 

That realization hit me first…it felt like He was saying, “Well there you are, my precious child.  Finally you have REALLY decided to call out to me.”  Not just sending up prayer requests, (as I had continued to do through my trial with hard liquor), but actually realizing that He never left me and would answer my cries because He loves me.

 

What He revealed in vision and with the most beautiful sounding crystal clear voice I will ever hear, will remain between He and I and the few people I have been pressed to tell.  But what He told me equipped me for Kingdom work.  During that conversation, I told Him that I would serve Him all the days of the rest of my life.

 

There have been days where I’ve failed Him in service and keeping my word, but He has NEVER failed me!  He has given me beautiful songs to share with people, and many unique opportunities to share them.  He has blessed me with an artistic ability in the realm of painting and sketching that I never knew I had.  And He has pressed me to write.  I mean HARD!  If I don’t write what is laid on my heart, it just gets louder until I finally give in and sit down and just do it!

 

He has allowed me to see so many beautiful miracles, as well as answered all of my prayers, and He has always provided for me and my family, even when the funds did not add up in our favor, there, a way would be made, He is SO GOOD!

 

I got facebook a few years back and began sharing the things of the world that were going on right under our preoccupied noses, but these things were not very well received by many of my friends and family.  What did Jesus say about not being well received in His hometown…well…I’ll let you do a little research.

 

And that is why I am here.  I know that God will lead people here that will be more receptive to what ol’ Spacie  Stacie has to say.  But I need you to understand this one thing.  Anything that you find helpful is from the Lord.  All Glory, Honor and Praise need to be brought before the throne, for I am just a willing vessel.

 

I also want to encourage you always to pray upon anything and everything I post.  Ask for discernment, and the wisdom to know the truth from anything that does not sit right with your spirit.

 

With all of that being said, welcome to my blog.  I appreciate you dropping in.  Don’t be a stranger!    I will be sharing encouragement as well as shining a light upon the lesser published news that I feel we deserve to know.

 

Vaya con Dios, mis amigos!

Stacie Ann

4 Comments
  1. Nice blog! Can’t wait to read more. The devices of man are indeed his idols. What will they do when their idols can no longer speak sweet lies to them? What will they do when calamity strikes as you said, and they cry out to Abba but he refuses to hear them because they would not hear Him??

    What a sad day indeed. God bless you.

  2. Thank you for your kind works! Many blessings in return, Sister Selena!

  3. Mom permalink

    Stacie, I am so proud of you. It’s easy for people to make comments one way or the other but it takes courage to bare one’s soul in this manner. You leave yourself open to mankinds cruelest ways so therefore I remind you to put on God’s armor everyday (Ephesians 6:10-18) so that you may stand against the devil’s firey arrows. Use discernment and give glory to the Lord and he will guide all your steps (and words). Love and cherish you, Mom.

    • I don’t even know what to say! (How unusual of me, haha!) Thank you Mom, not just for what you’ve said, but for raising me in the Light and Love of our Father! A gift more valuable than gold! I love and cherish you as well!

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